Positive thoughts and practices are the
weights that keep us sharp and toned.
Hiiiii! My name is Abigail and weather affects my mood. (And the room says, “Hi Abigail” LOL!)
I don’t know why we still change time, but my mind and body definitely have to take a moment to adjust each year. Five o clock starts to feel like 9 o'clock and I just miss having more sunshine in my afternoons.
Until I can find a way to make the states change that rule, lol (for real though) I have a few hobbies that I enjoy throughout the year, and make sure I put them into play during the fall and winter months. If you are interested in finding a fun and new hobby, let me introduce you to a few of mine.
Coloring sparks my joy! It’s been a form of therapy I’ve enjoyed for years even before it started to trend again. It’s an inexpensive hobby that only takes a few supplies.
Listening to music, an audio book, a podcast or silence are great ways to stimulate your mind in the best way. And the kid in you will be so happy.
1. Trying New Recipes
I love trying new things and Pinterest supports my habit to the utmost!
Sometimes I will get unfamiliar vegetables from a local source that I haven’t cooked with before, so I’ll find a new recipe online.
I also look for new recipes when I need a different way to cook something I often eat. Sometimes I don’t want to make turkey sausage the way I regularly make it. So, I’ll look for a new recipe that contains ingredients I already have in my kitchen.
Working out is so beneficial to the mind.
No matter how much I might've dreaded getting to the point of working out, afterwards, I always get a boost of confidence and energy because I know I just did something to better myself as a whole. (and I do my best not to go in the kitchen and wipe out all the calories I burned lol)
Those are three hobbies I use as seasonal depression antidotes. Do you enjoy any of these hobbies? Leave a comment. I’d love to hear from you.
Until next time.
What is a mastermind group?
A mastermind group is a peer-to-peer mentoring group used to help members solve their problems with input and advice from the other group members. The concept was coined in 1925 by author Napoleon Hill in his book The Law of Success, and described in more detail in his 1937 book Think and Grow Rich.
My personal experience of being in a mastermind group has enriched my life in so many ways. Let me share my experience with you:)
How did I find my mastermind group?
My mastermind group was developed from knowing these ladies from a networking group in which we are all members. The networking group we are in meets once a month (pre-covid).
However, we were yearning for more support more often, so we created a weekly mastermind group aside from the monthly networking meeting.
The wonderful thing about coming from the same networking group is knowing that we all had similar mindsets so we knew that was a great foundation.
How many people should a mastermind have?
Through research, it says the ideal size of a mastermind group tends to have 4-8 members. It says less than four, the energy level can drop and more than eight, you’ll probably run out of time. My group currently has 7 members.
How does your mastermind work?
Being that there are seven various personalities, we do have strategies in place to make the most out of our meetings.
Here’s a jist of how someone sharing will form their thoughts:
1) What goals were/weren’t accomplished (yet) from last week.
2) What they plan to work on/accomplish this week.
3) Let us know how we can serve/support them.
(Examples of support: Taking a survey to help their business, supporting a post on their page, keeping an eye out if we hear about a job that will suit them, praying for a family member)
*Support comes in all types of ways and sometimes a goal for the week may not be business oriented. It may be decluttering a bedroom to feel more peaceful. The purpose is to support, whatever that looks like.)
How my mastermind has benefited me:
I’ve been a part of this particular mastermind for 5 years. I can think of SO MANY ways they have supported me, but the moment that comes to mind is when my uncle unexpectedly passed away. It threw my family and me for a loop. My mastermind, along with other AMAZING people planned out a food schedule to supply us with a meal every night. Y’all, I DIDNT HAVE TO COOK FOR A MONTH.
Let that sink in.
As all of your energy is going into planning the celebration of someone’s life, thinking about what to cook is not even on the radar. Food was cooked, ordered and delivered, or brought to us. I’m filled with emotion and such gratitude as I type this.
This is one of the many reasons why the support of a mastermind is a blessing. And I could talk for DAYS about how my business has flourished having people to regularly bounce ideas off of and most importantly, knowing what I say or any ideas I have will never leave the group. It’s the loyalty for me.
I asked my mastermind group to give me a few benefits they get from being in a mastermind.
Take a look:
- Community support
- Helps me stay focused
- Soundboard for ideas
- New perspectives
They had more lol but I don’t want to keep you long.
Create or join a mastermind group:
Since the pandemic, we have transitioned to virtual and it still works very well. The wonderful thing about today’s world is that everything is virtual!! Yes, the people in this particular mastermind group happen to be local, but it is very doable to create a group with people from all over the world!
“We may not have it all together, but together we have it all!”
- Women’s Prosperity Network
Let me know below if you are a part of a mastermind group or if you are interested in becoming a part
Until next time:)
Have you ever thought about starting a blog? Do you need a creative outlet and you think blogging could be for you? Or you know someone who could benefit from hearing experiences from someone who has done it for a couple years? You have to read this!
Let’s get into it.
#10: Do not let an audience be your driving force.
I’m pretty sure there are a few blogs that I had to be my own audience for. I don’t even think my mom got around to commenting on it or giving it one like so I could have some sort of engagement lol!
Here’s the thing though, it’s not that my work wasn’t good, it’s just that I’m writing in a world where the attention span of adults is 8 seconds or less and it takes A LOT to keep people’s attention.
You know that text you read? You responded to it in your head, but not actually in
real life? Lol. Yeah, your intention was good, but you left somebody hanging lol.
Friends, family, and subscribers may say in their heads, ”Oh, that’s got to be a good read. Let me save the link and come back to it.” Unfortunately, they don’t always find their way back.
The intention was there, but you end up being left with a blog you worked hard on without any engagement.
I say all this to say, you have to enjoy blogging and not solely do it for the
recognition of others. Your determination and end goals have to be stronger than the
disappointment, aggravation, and frustration that will introduce themselves to you from time to time in your journey.
9) Access. Make it easy!
The easier you make it to access and share your blog, the more people will come and tell a friend! It’s no secret that this world wants everything to come quick and easy. It can’t all be that way, but access to your blog can:) Make your blog links and website easy to find and access.
#8: You have to be a sharing person.
Do you know how to share? (Real question. I know many adults that still struggle with this lol.)
Your subscribers come to your blog to receive something. What are you providing for them? Are you providing knowledge, details on where your outfits come from; how you released 50+ pounds in a healthy and pleasurable way? Whichever one it is, you have to be willing to continuously provide your audience with what they’re coming to your platform for.
#7: Proof reading is a MUST!
I get my blogs proof read as much as possible before posting. Two pair of eyes are better than one. I’ve seen big time bloggers have quite a few grammatical errors. To keep things profesh (professional), I’d suggest getting your blog posts proof read before they go live. Besides your own personal pleasure of keeping things professional, companies that browse your work will be impressed. (I hope I spelled everything right in the post lol)
#6) Make sure it sparks joy (In my Marie Kondo voice)
In the words of Marie Kondo, “If an item doesn't ‘spark joy’ when it's touched, the person
should thank it for being a part of his life, and then donate or trash it.”
She’s referring to items, but this same motto can be used for blogging. Do you enjoy it? Does it spark joy? If it does, keep at it, if it doesn’t, find another way to share your gifts with the world. (Find another way, don't give up.)
We all know what this word means. However, it’s easier said than done. Try your best to be consistent. If you fall off, don’t be hard on yourself and do your best to get that consistency going again. Be kind to yourself.
#4: Planning/scheduling is key.
Planning ahead of time always helps and relieves many people’s habits of procrastination.
Create a schedule for yourself to help keep your creation process smooth.
Saturdays: Write blogs.
Sundays: Get them edited/proof read.
Mondays: Create marketing: email blasts, social media posts, IG graphics.
#3: Marketing strategy
There are lots of people I talk to and through conversation they happened to say “my blog.” If they didn’t say that, I would’ve never known they had a blog! Marketing is very very…did I say very important? Very important.
You can drop GEMS, but if no one knows about it, those gems sit there unused by people that could’ve benefited from your work. Shamelessly promote yourself and your work. Blast it on all your platforms and be excited when doing so!
Your excitement will transfer to others.
Listen, if you want to work smart and not hard, automate as much as you can. Manual work takes time and we all know how precious our time is. Automate as much as you can.
#1: Know your “why.”
I know we hear that a lot now, but it’s very significant. If your reason for starting a blog is to just get free things, reality check: I haven’t received one free thing in my 2 years of blogging. How’s that for total transparency lol. My reason for starting this blog was bigger than just receiving things.
Now, do I want to partner with likeminded companies soon and get paid to do it,
ABSOLUTELY. However, that didn’t show up in the first 2 years for me. So it really tested
whether or not I was in this thang to just “get” or in it to “give” as well.
There’s a lot more I’ve learned in this two-year blogging journey that I’m continuing, but I’ll save that for another time. If this has been helpful to you, leave a comment below and let me know which lesson resonated with you most.
Hey, remember these words if you want to start a blog:
have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.” – Zig Ziglar.
Now let me go back, read this and make sure I’m taking all my own advice. Byeeeee!
This blog post is simple, yet very imperative. I am here to offer some advice as well as continue to practice what I teach and put some action behind it.
Today’s public service announcement is a reminder to:
SUPPORT YOUR FRIENDS!
As simple as it sounds, sometimes we forget (self included) to show love to those close to us.
Before going any further, I want to take time to thank YOU (I see you smiling) for your continued support for me and "The ABnormal Life."
We are approaching our two year Blog-i-versary soon. (Freaks out for 2 secs!)
I am SO grateful this platform has connected me to phenomenal people like you. Your engagement and kind words keep me uplifted and pushing towards continued greatness.
Now, there are various ways to support our friends.
Knowing that everyone’s situation is different, I’ve offered different ways for you to support your friends for whatever season you are in.
If monetary support doesn’t align with the season you’re in at the moment, know that there are others ways to support and your friends should be just as grateful for that support as well.
I’d like to show support and shine a super bright light on a black owned company I recently had the pleasure of supporting.
If you’ve been following me for a while, you might remember a series I started called the “Pay It Forward” Series.
It was a series I created to introduce, bring awareness, and give exposure to amazing people and their brands. I’d love to re-awaken that series starting today!
Today’s “Pay It Forward” Episode is shining a light on:
“Carefree and Black Diaries”
"Carefree and Black Diaries is a podcast that discusses everything from culture, politics, music, and education. But with a dash of hood on the rocks. Just a Black Girl navigating this thing called life and documenting it along the way."
It is hosted by my incredibly talented friend, Shaakira White. (https://www.instagram.com/shaakirawhite/ )
I recently had the opportunity to accompany her as well as another amazing woman, Diamond Rollins. (https://www.instagram.com/diamondalicia_/ )
Our podcast episode was just realeased yesterday! (I’m excited!)
Our discussion is from a content creator's perspective about working with brands, the changing landscape in influencing, and learning how we’ve been navigating these uncertain times as creative entrepreneurs.
I really enjoyed our discussion. There were a lot of laughs and a few golden nuggets that you don’t want to miss out on. :)
You can visually watch the discussion or listen to the audio.
Be sure to follow Carefree and Black Diaries on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carefreeandblackdiaries/
Shaakira, thank you for creating a safe space for black women. Your hard work does not go unnoticed. You are making an incredible impact with your knowledge and your voice. I support you 100%!
Well, that’s it for today's “Pay It Forward” episode. Please enjoy the podcast and leave comments.
If you have a small business and would like to be highlighted in a “Pay It Forward” episode, email me at: email@example.com
As always, remember to be completely and uniquely YOU!
I’ve tried for years to deflect the stereotype “angry black woman” from being associated with me.
I am a dark skinned woman with big thick hair and a dominant personality. Unfortunately, in this world, before I even open my mouth, people develop a pre-conceived notion about me.
I have no idea who coined this phrase, but I do know in the black community, we’ve altered various things about ourselves to not be “that angry black woman.”
We’ve done things like heightening the tone of our voice to sound more “pleasant” in others’ eyes, wearing our hair straighter to be seen as more professional, changing our names so we can make it to an in-person interview, and smiling way more than we probably would like to. And those are just scratching the surface.
I joined an Instagram live with Paola Mathe, founder of Fan Djanm and another young lady. They were talking about the stereotype “angry black woman.”
Listening to their beautiful exchange through conversation had me thinking.
With all that is going on in the world, our black lives brutally being taken away and numbers rising like a score at an Olympic basketball game, leaves me disgusted.
Disgusted, sad, scared, and rightfully so, VERY ANGRY.
I’m angry for reasons like Breonna Taylor’s killers, who burst into her apartment, shot her eight times,
and STILL haven’t been put six feet under…I mean arrested.
I am angry because I have had the hardest time going to sleep this past week because of what happened to her. That could’ve been me. I look forward and value my sleep time, but that hasn’t come so easily lately.
You know I could go on and name countless other incidents that have taken black lives that could have been PREVENTED, but I said that to say;
I AM AN ANGRY BLACK WOMAN.
What is happening is UNACCEPTABLE.
Please believe I will continue to do everything I can to save my people.
I am angry right now because justice needs to be served.
But please know, on a regular, black women should not automatically be seen as angry.
Yes, we have strong demeanors, because what we’ve been through is so deeply rooted, but we are not angry by nature. Just because our demanding presence and Maya Angelou-like voices may intimidate you doesn’t give you the right to call us angry. Learn how to accept it and adjust.
I will not dim my light to make those around me feel more comfortable. (work in progress.)
What I’m saying is, there will be no more conforming to what others think is right. Because we are dying no matter what. Educated or not, rich or in poverty, they are killing us.
I said that to say, BE UNIQUELY AND COMPLETELY your authentic self and the world around you will learn to adjust.
And if you can’t find a job because of your name, don’t worry, I’ll hire you soon. It’s coming:)
Thank you for reading and here are a few tips:
If you're black: Be your authentic self. It is beautiful and don’t ever let someone convince you otherwise.
If you’re white: Be mindful of what you say. Don’t be afraid of us. Yes, we are very powerful beings, and graciously, all we’re asking for is equal chances in life.
“Be the change you wish to see in this world.”
- Mohandas Gandhi
Check out this Instagram video:
I jogged today, like usual.
I also very recently found out about the young black man, Ahmaud Abery, that was jogging and got murdered by two white supremacists.
I didn’t run at my usual time. I'm a morning workout person. I love jogging in the morning with the permeating crisp breeze before the sun reaches its total ascension. However, I woke up too late to work out before I went to work.
After work, I looked up when sunset was and it wasn't until 8:19pm.
I came home, got changed, grabbed my workout partner, (my dog, Sable☺) and we started jogging around 7:40pm. My jogs are usually 30 minutes or less so I felt like I'd make it back before it got totally dark.
We started our jog and we were doing great. I wanted to make it a quick run, so we had good speed.
All was well...until the thought of the Ahmaud Abery illegitimately losing his life while jogging surfaced back to the top of my mind.
It hit me like a ton of bricks.
It must’ve slipped my mind that my purpose of running was to celebrate Ahmaud’s 26th birthday.
The thought hit me like I just heard it for the first time all over again. I think it's because I realized
I was performing the same action he was before his life was taken.
With an “out of breath” whisper, I said "Please God, let me make it home.”
As the sun set more, without even realizing, my jogging pace sped up.
Now, I'm blessed to live in a nice place and I jog around 3 times a week and haven't had many problems, but, I automatically felt like a target was on my back.
Yes, there were other people walking and strolling, but they didn't have the same skin complexion as I do.
As I was coming down my last hill, a black truck was coming the opposite way. It was driving relatively slow as it crept half way up the hill and began to turn down a side road.
As the truck turned, there was a white muscular forearm hanging outside of the window and I felt myself hesitate.
As the car disappeared, I got so angry.
Why do I have to feel and live like this?
Yes, I'm a God girl and ask God to cover me each and every day, but with horrific incidents happening like this with no rapid consequences (He was killed in February) being done, this world does not give me the comfort of feeling safe.
When will it stop? *takes deep breath*
Whenever an innocent black life is lost, I go through various emotions of devastation,
sadness, anger.....anger....anger, sympathy & more. This, however, is the first time I'm writing about it.
I think this blog post was more for me than it was for you.
Having an outlet to release is truly therapeutic.
If you've read this far, I want to thank you for hearing me and seeing life from my point of view for a few minutes.
There's still a lot to be done in this world, but I somehow have hope and faith this
world will be a better place in my lifetime and I will be a part of that betterment.
2 Timothy 1:7 – For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and love, and of a sound mind.
The "Ahmaud Arbery Run Challenge" took place last Friday, May 8th, on his birthday. People in various places walked/jogged/ran 2.23 miles in his honor. Search #runwithmaud to see everyone who participated.
I want you to take a moment and reminisce back to when you were in your pre-teens/teens and were on punishment. Your parents took your phone and TV away and didn’t allow you to hang out with your friends for any extracurricular activities. Yes, you were pissed off at first…
After getting over being mad, you found yourself reading a book, cleaning your room, and writing in your diary/journal as therapy. After your punishment had been lifted, yes, you missed your phone and friends; but you surprisingly ended up being grateful for that “me” time to create, spend time with self and pick back up on hobbies you hadn’t done in a while.
That’s exactly how I feel about this quarantine time! I feel like it’s a grateful punishment.
I think I consider myself an extroverted introvert. So yes, I miss people, but it is nice not having to decide between working some more or going to happy hour with friends. That decision is being made for us right now!
While we are in this time of isolation, let’s use it to our advantage.
We are all creators in our various lanes. Whether you’re a makeup artist (practice highlight/contouring), an interior designer (creating new color palettes), or a lawyer (Working on writing/speaking skills), we can all work on perfecting our craft. Specifically, in my field of content creation, if you’re like me, at times you are the photographer, director, editor, AND model.
You do a lot yourself.
Because of that, this is a great time to dive in and cultivate a bunch of content. This blog came from having time and thinking,
“How I can be of service and help fellow creators like myself?”
Here are three golden tips for creating during this time:
1. Exercise regularly.
(Outside if weather permits) I know you might not have expected this to be one of the tips, but exercising gets your endorphins flowing which reduces stress, works off anxiety and feelings of depression, and boosts self-esteem. It’s a daily mindset booster! Oh and while you’re doing that, that Vitamin D from the sun is seeping inside you and supporting your immune system. It’s a great way to start a day of creating.
Take a moment to flesh out ideas so you can create new concepts, and solve problems. Usually brainstorming happens within groups, but with social distancing, if not on Zoom, we can’t gather together. I know you’re capable of coming up with lots of million dollar ideas.
3. Work hard now. Play later.
Listen, when we are released from social distancing and are able to be around our friends and family again, I am going to be the life of every party! Lol. In order to do that, I am working hard now and creating as much as I can, so I can have more than enough content to schedule out and last for a while. I don’t want to feel like, “Omg, I can’t hang out because I have to catch up on…”
So, I am working now, so I can play and be fully present with my family and friends soon.
That’s all I have for now. If this helped, encouraged or resonated with you, let me know in the comments! I look forward to seeing all of your amazing content in the future that I know you’re working hard on now!
For the first official blog of the year, I felt led to write in the “mindset motivation” segment of the blog because having the right mindset in life is the foundation of it all.
I’m going to share a quick story of a time when I had a go-getter mindset to just go for something and put myself out there.
Once upon a time…just kidding lol! I used to feel like every story started with that phrase lol.
Real story time: Last summer, I volunteered to travel with the youth at my church to a youth conference called “Forward Conference.” I did a whole post about how amazing my experience was and how I probably got just as much or even more out of it than the kids did. You can find that post here:
However, in that post, I didn’t get a chance to talk about a poignant moment I experienced while there.
Ok so, a short version of what the Forward Conference is:
Forward Conference is a youth conference that gathers around 13,000 youth in an arena to be a part of an incredible weekend of worship and fun. It was my first time being there and it was mind-blowingly amazing! Check out my “FwdCon 19” highlights on my Instagram page:
So my purpose of being there was to chaperone. But the way my mind works, I’m always making the most out of every moment.
One of the days at the conference, I’m just sitting in the arena waiting for the performances to start when I had this epiphany.
“Abigail, you are in an arena that’s hosting a worship conference for over 13,000 kids…and for those 13,000 kids, they have provided MULTIPLE clothing vendors for the youth to spend their coins.
You are an influencer that motivates and inspires others through fashion. This is a GOLD MINE! A PLAYGROUND. Put yourself out there and go connect. “
So, the conference had just started. For me, this was the opportune time to go to the vendors and network while most of the youth were in the arena. I build up enough “umf” to do it. I make sure my lipstick is refreshed because 1st impressions are imperative. I make sure the kids are covered and I let one of the other chaperones know I’m stepping out for a second. (smooth criminal vibes lol)
I have my business cards easily accessible and ready to whip out.
I take my time and walk around the entire arena. Yep. Got my steps in that day.
As I visit, I’m looking at all the apparel and observing the sellers.
You should know by now that I am very intentional with what companies I work with. I don’t do it just to get a check. If I plan on producing quality content and introducing my supporters to it, their quality and overall mission needs to be legit.
SO, I’m going around and when I find a company I vibed with, I made my way to the front, I introduced myself and smoothly gave them my card while engaged in great conversation.
I finally made my way around and went back into the arena to enjoy the performances for the day session.
We then leave, grab a bite to eat, and head back to the hotel to get ready for the night session.
As I was getting dressed, I got a text from one of the businesses asking if I was coming back to the night session because they’d love to meet me……...!!!!
SEE what happens when you put yourself out there!!!
Met with the guy, he had already taken a look at my Instagram page (Remember that’s your visual resume) and saw the quality content I put out. We made a great connection and I left with multiple pieces of apparel that night. He let me choose what I wanted and that was that.
He definitely took a chance because I could’ve taken that apparel and not given him any content in return, but I showed myself worthy, gave him fire content, built a trustworthy work relationship and we’ve been working together ever since.
I put myself out there.
That wasn’t the initial reason I happened to be at that conference, but I thought outside of the box, and made the most of my experience while there.
He was the only vendor to reach back out to me and that’s okay. I’ll take one solid relationship over multiple mediocre ones.
We still work together today.
Lesson: Put yourself out there. You never know how much of a blessing you can be to someone with the special gifts you have.
Keep that top of mind.
Phenomenal education, unmatchable marching bands, step shows, tailgating, laughter, lifelong memories, oh and did I say phenomenal education?!
You may be familiar with an HBCU, but if you’re not, HBCU’s are Historically Black Colleges and Universities.
They are institutions of higher education that were established before the Civil Rights Act of 1964 with the intention of offering accredited, high-quality education to African American students across the United States. These schools do, however, admit students of all races.
(Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you.)
In 2017, there were said to be 107 HBCU’s in the United States.
Why did I choose an HBCU?
I grew up living fairly close to an HBCU. Close enough that I could hear the marching band practice at night. I attended games as a child with family members and was involved in quite a few programs that took place on their campus.
Since a child, I’ve always wanted to attend an HBCU. As I got older, actually understanding the concept and learning more about them, I realized being educated with my people, and mostly by my people, would be an unforgettable experience. I knew I could go to another college and have the other more common experience of a Predominantly White Institution (PWI) for grad school; but I knew from the get go, I wanted the experience of going to an HBCU for undergrad.
Now, indulge me as I share a couple of my great HBCU experiences.
#1: African American Humanities Class
Taking African American Humanities my freshmen year was LIFE CHANGING.
One of my favorite professors, Dr. White, changed a lot of students’ perspectives (or mindsets), including mine within that class.
I remember one day my whole class and I walked out of the classroom in awe from the correct information we learned about our culture. It was like a film had just been taken off of our eyes and we could see clearly and didn’t need glasses anymore.
We all finished that class with even more pride in our heritage, being proud of who we are and the experiences we’ve overcome.
Here’s another quick example of why I love HBCU’s.
#2: Science Class
In science, I was taught about Henrietta Lacks.
Henrietta Lacks was an African-American woman that made one of the greatest medical contributions ever. Her cells became the first immortal human cell line – the cells reproduce infinitely in a lab. (mind blown)
I had no idea how big of a deal that was until the movie about her came out and I was familiar with the story, however my friend that attended a non HBCU or PWI wasn’t familiar with her story at all.
Aside from classroom knowledge, the fellowship and relationships I gained through extra-curricular activities are unforgettable.
HBCU’s: They take care of you and prepare you for this world in a special way.
Since homecoming season is active right now, I wanted to take a moment to pay homage to universities that pushed us to be greater.
Happy Homecoming season!!!
Special shout out to my Alma Mater, Alabama State University, AND the HBCU that deeply influenced my childhood/adolescence and decision to go to an HBCU, FAMU.
“Historically Black Colleges and Universities, or HBCU’s, have played an important role in enriching the lives of not just African Americans, but our entire country.” – Ric Keller
A friend once shared this quote with me which I later learned was from Richard Bach:
“We teach what we most need to learn.”
The things I share on this blog are sprouted from experiences I’ve had and/or lessons I’ve learned or still may be learning. This one, is a daily lesson.
In a world where social media is in our faces 24/7 with everyone’s highlight reel of their life and mostly keeping the real deal life stuff private (which they have every right to do); it can be challenging at times.
You don’t see the bad, and the ugly...just the good.
Then, you have most of society telling you how the timeline of your life is supposed to look:
Graduate college, go for master and/or doctorate, find the one and get married, buy a house, have kids, work till sixty…and the societal list goes on and on and on.
Ummmm, NOT QUITE.
I knew from a young age that my life would be taking the road less traveled. It took me some time to understand and adjust to that realization (thanks for a great mom) but, I eventually embraced it...hence “The ABnormal Life.” I totally celebrate the outside-of-the-box way of thinking and living.
HOWEVER! I’d be lying through my teeth if I said this path less taken was a stroll in the park. Nah, it’s more like a triathlon with a plethora of twists, jumps, turns, and leaps…leaps of faith that is :)
And with that, people who decided to take the more common route (and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that) may seem like they have it a bit easier. Then the doubt of your life not going how theirs is begins to seep in.
Now, pay attention…
Once that first “comparison” thought comes, it’s SO easy to go down that rabbit hole of comparison, self-doubt, and regret.
DON’T DO IT!
We’ve all been there and it’s a dark and unhappy place. Don’t do that to yourself.
Instead, once you feel your mindset going to that “comparison” phase, have a coping method in place to counteract those thoughts.
Here’s my example:
As soon as I feel myself starting to compare, I instantly start repeating my personal affirmations:
I am intelligent
I am beautiful
I am on the right path!
I am walking in my purpose!
And the thing is…I may not even believe what I’m saying at the time! BUT, I’m putting those positive thoughts out into the atmosphere. I’m changing my mindset by saying those things. Let’s not forget the power of the tongue.
I find my affirmations most helpful when I don’t believe what I’m reading. It’s those times when I don’t feel beautiful or intelligent that I have to reiterate that to myself and get my mind back to a positive state.
Remember, it’s not about how you start, but how you finish.
We are imperfect humans and negative thoughts will come, but the biggest test is how we handle it.
Know that you have the power to keep your mind stayed on positivity.
Also remember, this is a daily practice. This isn’t something that happens once and it’s done. You have to keep positive practices like journaling and affirmations in your daily regimen.
Continue to enjoy the amazing and unique path that was created JUST FOR YOU.
*Now let me go back and read this whole blog to myself!